Zach Steele

Dear Community,

I have something to say i have never told anyone... I am Zack Steele's Father. This may come as a shock to some of you... It really is a long story filled with adventures and time travelling and science. Long story short... 10 years from now me and Iain build a time machine... I know this sounds crazy but this is 100% true... the DNA test's proved I am his father. Step's i shall take to support him? nothing... but one day if he's successful he shall give me money.

Your Best Friend,
       Eagle771

hello children.

i would like to recount a story of epic proportions, including the likes of david and sam.
so there was this one day where david went to the store. which store? unimportant. what is important is that david saw a hispanic man. and being the racist bastard that he is, david slapped the hispanic man, who we'll call george, right in the face. obviously george retaliated, punching david in the everything. then sam came in and he was all like "all your spaniards are belong to me" so david left, shamefaced and bleeding from the everything.

WERE BACK BABY

School's back thus, I am restarting the blog... NEW AUTHORS! CRAZY GIMMICKS! Well, actually the same lame authors but... It'll still be great

so... new leader...

so God, i have one thing to say:

i see what you've done with the place...

and...

you're good...

Welcome to our new leader!

Hello all!

I am pleased to be welcomed so warmly, and in such open arms. I really appreciate Eagle771 stepping down from his position of head douchebag, and letting me run the show for a bit.

Now, with your new leader there shall be many changes.

1. No Asians
2. No gingers
3. No Davies...s
4. If you're a bird, get the FUCK out.

The blog will be renamed to God.info, and it will cost one performance of fellatio upon entrance.

And with that my children, I am off. May the light guide you. I am a prot pally.

Fuck Bitches Get Money.

tech class lol

well david isn't here at the moment so i'm typing this to take advantage of his inability to censor what i'm saying.
cunt.
that is all.

oh and also whoever did the red background thing i hate you.

Richard has a girlfriend!

Yesterday, Richard came to school sporting a hot new haircut!

Richard was living DA LIFE. All the girls in the Cafeteria and Library were flocking to him!

(Please note, this is the same universe in which David, Iain and Myself are deceased)

Richard was hippin and floppin all over the place. All except one girl was not all over him. He decided that by the end of the day, he'd make this girl go crazy for him!

Richard dressed up. He slicked his hair backwards, wore a shirt with NOT ONE, but TWO colours on it, got a rose and journeyed his way to Juanita Jimminez. Of course, since I am dead, I can only imagine what Juanita said.

"Oh, hello Richard, what do you want?" Said Juanita.

Richard didn't say anything. All he did was point at Juanita with both fingers, then pointed to himself, then commenced to humping the air. Juanita was truly disgusted. As she turned away, Richard was flabbergasted. In a last try, he said.

"Please, wait! I have a confession!"

Juanita stopped, she turned around to face Richard, who was on his knees in tears.

"It was I, Richard Dixon D'Angelo who killed Iain! Woe is to me! And it was I who instructed the drunk David to go into a slaughter house dressed up as a cow!"

TO BE CONT.

Hacking DAT mainframe

For safety reasons of the people in this post i will not use there actual name
The other day, I was attempting to hack Dat mainframe of the national security network. Iain was busy fapping so I had to hack it all alone! To start i went onto "Brendanz" computer and began rapidly hitting the keyboard. That didn't work unfotunely so I started bashing it with a rubber hose, eventually i realized my methods were fruitless, you know what? this post sucks

Our tech teacher is a sherpa

  A recent finding by one of our brightest researchers has discovered that our tech teacher half Nepalian, which means she's a sherpa :O epic twist!!,  Tech teacher possibly one of those people climbing that mountain shhh

TUESDAYS

i really hate tuesdays. would you like to be enlightened on the reason, children? it's because it has no reason, and no purpose.I mean, monday is the beggining of the week, and that's not great, but at least monday has a purpose. wednesday is the middle of the week, which at least gives you some inspiration to complete the week. With thursday at least you can look forward to friday. but tuesday? WHAT THE FUCK IS TUESDAY?TUESDAY is the bastard son of a thousand fathers and has absolutely no meaning ever. you can't even look forward to the next day because the next day is wednesday.. it's just like... the prisoner that's so ugly no one even wants to molest him in the shower.FUCK TUESDAYS

taken from double d's journal of fun

http://iain.eagle771.info

REAL 40TH POST IAIN YOUR A DUMBASS

This is the REAL 40th post, isn't it inpsiring?

4OTH POST BIATCHES IN DA HOOD

GOOD EVENING PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO LIFE WHATSOEVER

i'm here to congratulate people on reading all 40 posts made by us...we...nous avons, vous avez, you get this gist of it, here at eagle's perch. so ya... have fun reading more.


or i'll find you

THIS POST IS HAWT

i would like to alert the general public that this post is hawt. not temperature wise, in which case i would have spelled it "hot". this post is "hawt" as in you know like, you wanna bang that shit. this post makes you wanna just like whip it out and go nuts.

Don't Kill Me or my Authors

Some of my authors, Like justin like to write mean things, I allow them freedom of speech and if anything they write offends anyone in anyway shape or form, do not persucute me for it! I am not a power hungry dictator who will take away freedom of speech, I feel for the people being made fun of but if they have a problem they take it up with the author not me. Thank You and Goodnight. If you want a post taken down I REPEAT ask the FUCKING AUTHOR if he says yes I'll destroy it like Justin Nyugen destroys a jamaican Patty.

With much love,
Admin Eagle771

PS: Child Porn I WILL TAKE OFF SO DON'T EVEN IAIN,

cringed

ahaha

Oshit.

So like.

Nuclear Holocaust. Blah Blah Blah.

The End.

Oh, and one last thing.

Richard is pregnant. Yeah. Shit happens. Sorry Richard, we all love you.


-The Eagle's Perch Team.

Haircut

Yesterday me and Iain both got a haircut, He's a full ginger... disgusting... anyway here are some random photos of weird things we saw... First up the hobo bong... thats a tube yes and the bottom of the cup is perfectly cut off and shoved on to the tube, it may not look like much but its a hobo bong. Second is a random pair of panties that saw on the ground near westskate. No idea why there is a random pair of panties. I sent that photo to a friend of mine and she sent back a even weirder thing she found on the ground while walking around.

With much love,
Iain and David

1000 HITS BCHS

LOLZ IN THE BUM we just reached HIT NUMBER 1 THOUSAND!!!!!!!!!!

IT'S OVER 9 THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAND!
WAIT

no it's not.

but still it's hot

big muhfuhkin post

YO GUYS
this is the biggest muda fakin post evar
k?
so today i was playing audiosurf in btt class and david, his arm severly broken in 3 places, decided to hit me with his cast. not only did this hurt like a bitch for me, it severly broke his arm in another place.
good job david.
so now i , sexy man (blog admin supreme x2), have to drive him to the hospital.

MadLib time!

Hello our feeble followers!

This is your fearless leaders; Justin and David.



We present to you, the Mad Lib of the century. So stop jacking off to 4Chan/h/, and let's do this.... together... ;)





Ben Dietz was feeling very -adjective-. He desired some nicely cooked -noun-. Why? Because today was the day that he was finally going to recieve a -noun- . He was very excited, so excited, that he -verb- with his -noun-. All of a sudden his -noun- walked into the room! They were -ADJECTIVE!- They decided to punish him because his -noun- splattered all over his -noun-'s face. Ben decided to leave home, and run to school, where he was going to meet his -noun- dealer. His dealer had different plans, and tied down ben and -verb-'ed him. Ben's -pronoun- could be heard from a mile away, yet no one -verb-'ed him.
Ben came home with a -adjective- -body part-.


THE END.


Put in your creative responses in the comments below! Or, if you want total anonymity, then email this to david_20047@hotmail.com

With much love,
Justin & David

Y not

1337

h3y guyz 1 w4s ju5t br0w51ng 4chan 4nd c4me up0n th1s ub3r 1337 d1sc. 4b0ut 1nt3rn3t sp34k lolz

ju5t 7h0ugh7 y0u 5h0u1d kn0w.

Hello my 7 followers muhahahahaha anyway whats up?  a friend of mine drew a sweet picture of me wearing a top hat so i am putting hers on... Sorry justin it beats yours of me in a fedora XD.
I'll upload it again when its done.

PS: anyone notice that all the ads on my site seem to be sexual in some way? weird...

SHIT IN YO PANTS

i just shat your pants.

you are SOOOOO unfortunate.

In continuation..

So, like I was saying in my last post...

Richard was living the life!

He had a girlfriend, he had a mansion, he had several sports cars and a tiny addiction to Meth. He was Da Man! In the middle of his kick-ass life, Richard recieved a phone call. He turned off his loud stereo, put away his Diamond-Encrusted Caviar and shook off the several hookers. The phone call was from the Fuzz Department. They asked Richard to come down to the station to answer some quests they were having with the mind-boggling death of Iain Reid. Richard agreed immediately, having already cooked up a delightful story if this day ever came.
At the police station, Richard was asked if Iain ever hung out with people that may have endangered his life in any way. Richard answered that Iain casually hung out with Transvestites, usually trying to score some cocaine from their anus'. The cops were skeptical, but continued the questioning. They also noticed that Justin Nguyen and David Baird were missing aswell. Richard replied that David was always a queer, and that his own retardedness would kill him one day. Justin, on the other hand, Richard was stumped. Justin was infact his closest friend he had ever had. To the day that Justin decided to give him his left over candy that has been sitting in his pocket for 5 days, to the day that Justin was dragged to his death in a slaughter house. Richard replied that he misses Justin, and that he hopes to one day find out what REALLY happened to his Best Friend.

My Class Period is over, so I will continue later.

I LOVE PENIS SOOOO MUCH FUCK YEAH DICKS IN MY MOUTH

Your Power Level

I know you've all probably been curious what YOUR power level is for a very long time... so i decided to google it... and i found a formula to calculate your power level As a follow up to the DBZ post from yesterday, here is a nifty little formula for you to ascertain your power level.




1. What’s your weight?

2. What’s your age?

3. How much can you lift?

4. How tall are you in inches?

Now, add your weight, age, pounds you can lift and how tall you are in inches, together and divide by 50. There’s your Power Level. The normal Human is between 5-8. What’s yours?
(Taken off chris davis's blog without permission but hell its the internet fuck him...)

SEX IN DA LIEDERHAUSEN

sometimes i have lots of dirty minded thoughts about what i could possibly do to a certain someone's mother with a block of processed cheese and some non-dairy fat-free whipped cream.

that is all.

The demise of Justin&David.

Oh baby.It's almost May, which brings April to it's ultimate end.Let's reflect on what has been happening on this blog since it's creation in Early January/February.Well.Admin Supreme David Baird, and Justin Nooyen met their grisly ends when David decided what it would be like to dress up as a cow and wander into a slaughter house. Justin, sensing that David was in dire trouble, decided to be the Hero of this story and save the day. Unluckily for Justin, while he was reaching into the Sawing Machine to retrieve what was left of David, Justin forgot what his mother told him that morning. It was to tie his shoes. Justin's loose shoe lace dragged him to his doom with David, (Irony?).
The next day, Richard heard of the sad and horrific news. Instead of doing what a normal grieving friend would do, Richard continued to eat his Breakfast. He then brushed his teeth, and put on his favorite neutral coloured shirt. When Richard arrived to school, everyone was mourning the great Justin and David, because as the name suggested, they were great indeed. But Richard saw an opportunity. Never shall Richard be shadowed by the Awesome-Asianess of Justin, or the wrath of the mighty David! Richard wasn't at all sad of the demise of Justin and David, no, he was quite content. But as the day grew long, Richard realised that no one was talking to him. No one was asking for his help, or basking in his righteousness and uberness. He looked around his school to see that everyone was flocking around the other contributer of this blog, Iain Reid. Enraged, Richard had to act fast!
After school, Richard had a plot. Iain, (Yes, that is infact how you spell his name, David fuck off with your over-the-shoulder-editing) was walking alone home. Richard came behind him like a super ninja and stabbed Iain in the neck. As Iain bled out on the sidewalk, Richard decided he could use the extra cash, and harvested Iain's organs. (Yes, Richard is creepy.)
The next day, Richard was now the only person left in the school who was totally awesome. He was now the most popular guy in the school, and he even got a bo... I mean Girlfriend. Yes, Richard DOES have a girlfriend, and more information about this absurd matter will follow when we get off our ass' and decide to write something about it.
Until then.
Justin and David. Our ghosts haunt laike a bech.

Life

You know how you don't know your asleep until you wake up and then the urge to go back to sleep is unbearable? Thats life my friends... one big shithole you wish you werent in it but hell you don't know what will happen if you leave it, Hey but thats why people like me are lazy, If I experience nothing will I live forever?... hell this post will probably take me the whole period to write, the teachers looking away so... Counterstrike time... Ok back to the post... Life uhh... hmmm i am done for today... by the way everyone who is not informed... RICHARD HAS A GIRLFRIEND!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Feeling down?

Are you feeling down? depressed? beat down? perturbed? opressed? frightened by my huge vocabulary? or just plain bummed out? Email me your story! and maybe i'll feel for you, help you, offer you advice or most likely just laugh at you! David_20047@hotmail.com the best story gets a hug from taylor swift

stay tuned bloggers, Justin will write the story of the century

LOLWUT

http://www.lolwut.com/ STARE AT THE LOLWUT PEAR!!! STARE AT ITTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4 20

big sexy blocks of pudding cheese FROMAGE fuck yeah it's 4 20, and it's time to go to your nearest dealer, grab some droogs and smoke up in a very public place.

69...

What is it about that number that makes people giggle whenever we hear it? Sure, I know its a sexual position but when you think of a Missionary what do you think of then? Not you Iain you don't count... Humans have only gotten to this point in time because life is just one long ordeal to impress the opposite sex. By the time if finished writing this through I forgot why I started... i'll end on that note...

:D

:D

How to be really kewl.

What makes a Super Hero or Super Villain? Is it the messed up childhood? Wearing your underwear outside your pants? Laser beams that shoot out of your face? NAY. To be a Super, you must first follow the laws that follow:


To be a Super Hero, you have to:

1: Be rich.
2:If you do not have the above, then you must have a uber awesome super power.
3: If you are a female, then you are required to wear the skimpiest outfit made entirely of plastic, latex, or spandex.
4: If male, you must have striking good looks, and more-then-average muscle build.
5: All of the above, (In respected gender)



Now, to be a Super VILLAIN.

1: You have some kind of mental or physical scar that shuns you from society.
2: You must be incredibly smart, (As most super villains have a doctorate in something.)
3: You must be extremely rich, or extremely poor.
4: Most important of all, you must have an arch enemy! As The Batman is to The Joker, as Superman is to Lex Luthor, or Doomsday.
5: You should be insane.
6: Not afraid to backstab an associate.
7: All of the above.

So, if you meet all the requirements for the profession that you wish to pursue, then please. Strap on that Spandex, Gel back your hair, grab your useless cape, and hop out that door! Go on Super Heroes of tomorrow, go save Earth from an Asteroid, or perhaps send an Asteroid to Earth! Your call!


This guide does not protect you from Pregnancies, or having fucked up babies with The Thing.

holiday inn hotels are sexy

hey guys namely Justin and David,
right now i'm at a holiday inn resort in virginia (lol virginia) and it's HOT. there's a pool of amazingness and a room full of treadmills that i'm partially scared of. over all, it's pretty fo sho homie in da ghetto. no i'm kidding but it's cool.

HEY

HEY BCHZ

just wanted to say hi.

Best Webcomic Ever!

Fucking best webcomic ever go read it right now! Doctor McNinja

Reverend Burn: Fat man's rant

http://technology.todaysbigthing.com/2010/03/03

HEY 'YALL!

Justins Sweet Drawing

Justin made a bitching cartoon imitation of me... check this shit out

Louis is riding his bike.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZdZgFAcN50

Lolwhut?

As most of you know, it is nearing the end of February! That means, it is almost March!
Now I know most of you are probably only looking forward to March because of the week or two off school, but hey, after a little bit of googling, you can learn alot about March! The following was taken from http://familycrafts.about.com/library/spdays/blmardayslong.htm

Happy Bloggin'



By popular request, here is a long list of all of the special days celebrated in March 2009. If you prefer, you can explore March's special days by date.
Month Long Observances
American Red Cross Month
Irish-American Heritage Month
Music in our Schools Month
National Craft MonthCheck out my page for this special day!
National Frozen Food Month
National Noodle Month
National Nutrition Month
Woman's History Month
Youth Art Month
Week Long Observances
1st Week - Newspapers in Our School Week
2nd Week - Bubble Gum Week
2nd Week - Crochet Week


And Also, happy Olympics!

Hit Counter

I added a hit counter lets see how many we can get... Get posting my minion authors

Who likes rickroll?

http://rickroll.it/6036f7

1,000,000 subscribers!

I am pleased to announce our one-millionth subscriber! This is an amazing milestone for us here at Eagle's Perch. We've worked long and hard to accomplish such an amazing feat and I would like to thank everyone who helped us along the way. Without the valuable contributions of the late Justin and David, this would have been impossible; may they rest in peace. To our one million followers, I must also extend y gratitude, without you guys, our site would have remained as desolate and boring as it was the day we began. Now, to our blog's future, and hopefuly, our 2 million subscriber milestone!

-Richard Davies,
Blog Admin Supreme

DIS BLOG IS MANAGED BY A CRAZY PERSON

No further information required.

Fiesta-Kah

Fiesta-Kah is around the corner, as it is every second month starter January on the 13th. May 13th is coming, and we hear at Eagle's Perch are very excited for this holiday that Justin has made up. So gather around our LCD Screen, and appreciate the existence of AWESOMENESS.

The Beginning

This is the Beginning of something that may be known for years or something that will be reduced to dust... Eagle's Blog... For those who shall read this let it be forever known... My awesomeness... As Justin reads over my shoulder :) i write this blog... The beginning of a new age! My age, My world... Ok man this was a lame blog entry... and no ones ever going to read this so i'll stop here...