Richard has a girlfriend!

Yesterday, Richard came to school sporting a hot new haircut!

Richard was living DA LIFE. All the girls in the Cafeteria and Library were flocking to him!

(Please note, this is the same universe in which David, Iain and Myself are deceased)

Richard was hippin and floppin all over the place. All except one girl was not all over him. He decided that by the end of the day, he'd make this girl go crazy for him!

Richard dressed up. He slicked his hair backwards, wore a shirt with NOT ONE, but TWO colours on it, got a rose and journeyed his way to Juanita Jimminez. Of course, since I am dead, I can only imagine what Juanita said.

"Oh, hello Richard, what do you want?" Said Juanita.

Richard didn't say anything. All he did was point at Juanita with both fingers, then pointed to himself, then commenced to humping the air. Juanita was truly disgusted. As she turned away, Richard was flabbergasted. In a last try, he said.

"Please, wait! I have a confession!"

Juanita stopped, she turned around to face Richard, who was on his knees in tears.

"It was I, Richard Dixon D'Angelo who killed Iain! Woe is to me! And it was I who instructed the drunk David to go into a slaughter house dressed up as a cow!"

TO BE CONT.